Pain: The receiving end of an ass-whipping.

Next game is Saturday, 12/3, at 9 AM at Waters.

A big turn out for opening day - 10 v 10. West beat East 54-21. This was actually a huge accomplishment for East considering the game started at 40 - 0. West had Tim D, Big Jim, Tom C, Paul C (Tom's brother), Joe K, Gio & Mark H. They also had three new players: Ken, Chris & Jeff. I think their last names were Anderson, Collinsworth & Hostetler. East had Levon Helm, Dances with Stars, Tommy B, Billy B, Kevin W, Patrick M, Connor M, Roger M, London Collin & new T fan Steven. The Sackinator played defense for both teams. I cannot remember who made all the plays, especially for the West - there were so many it's just too... painful. Ken had several very long scrambles for TD with East's inability to pull a flag. Chris and Jeff also caught several long balls for TDs. Tim D and Ken lit up East's secondary like Diwali. Big Jim was completing passes with his left arm - seriously! West finally scored on a long ball from Collin to Kevin. Then Collin ran one in and got West to semi-respectable double-digits.

On Saturday we had 6 v 6. West beat East 54-37. West had Big Jim, Tim D, Bob V, Gio, Rick the Pick & Mike P. East had Triple XL Todd, Levon Helm, Tommy B, Dances with Stars, Kevin W & Tito. The BIG play of the day was a nice one-handed grab by the largest WR ever, Todd, from Levon for TD. Reminded me of the '85 Bears. 308 lbs? That's probably pretty close.

We lost players to injury, Billy B and Roger M on Thursday, Rick the Pick on Saturday. Hopefully they will be back soon. Roger did not get hurt playing football. He got hurt when he made some "short" comment to this dude.

Seven of us played both days. It's not getting any easier. I almost needed a wheelchair to leave the field on Saturday. But after a tub of ice water, 12 Advil and half a bottle of tequila (and now that the hangover's gone), I cannot wait to play again!

Flags or no flags? We tried it on Thursday, played touch on Saturday. As much as they suck playing defense, flags are definitely a benefit on offense. I think we should try the flags again this week.

Criminal and the UF have both been missing so far this year. UF actually has a semi-legit excuse - he ran the JFK50 on 11/19 and his legs still hurt. A week later? Questionable. Criminal hurt his back doing a questionable activity.

Mr. T doesn’t breathe, air just hides in his lungs for protection. See you Saturday.

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T Fans Football Club

The 6th Annual Mr. T Football Club Kickoff

Our opening day is, as always, Thanskgiving. We start at 8 AM and we will play at Marshall HS. There are two fields, so look around. And bring a red shirt.

Criminal - you start at 7:30 AM. Then maybe you will be on time. UF, start basting your turkey early so too can be on time, flamer. And nobody wants to hear any prissy excuse about running 50 miles off-road the Saturday beforehand.

Game 2 is Saturday, November 26th, 9 AM @ Waters Field.

It's hard to believe its been five years since the Biles holiday party when Mr. T football was born. From Thanksgiving through the Superbowl we have not missed a Saturday since reaching critical mass in year three.

To commemorate this occasion, I have written a song. It's called "Play Football". (That took some thought.) Sung to the melody of Led Zeppelin's "Ramble On":

"Leaves are falling all around, It's time to get off your a$$.
Thanks to me, we play football. I don't need to hear your sass.
But now it's time for Mr. T. The frozen turf lights your way.
For now I see blood stains, and with it pain, and it's headed your way.
Ahh your jibba jabba makes me so tired, but you know you've got one thing you got to do...

[Chorus]
Play Football, And now's the time, the time is now, to Play Football.
I pity the fool, I got to take you to school, on my way.
Its been this way five years to the day, Play Football,
Gotta play the game and don't be lame.

Lame. I know. Apologies to Page and Plant. Just make sure you show up on Thanksgiving. And bring a red shirt.

Tommy B
Director of Antagonization
Mr. T Fans Football Club