Don’t ever call Mr. T just “T”. Somebody did that once, just once…...

We played 8v8 in the slush. Gio, Tito, Big Jim, Cooley, Twinkle Toes, Criminal, The UF, Kevin, Bob V, Tommy B, and new T fans, Tom C, Justin, Ben, Andrew, Brad, and one more (baseball coach at Madison?) That's right, you read correctly: The UF decided to take a break from his musical forays and play some football! It was wet and nasty - perfect football weather. VYI has taken the posts down at Waters so our ability to convert extra points has gone way up. Final score was 32 - 24, I think. Fred S took video of coverage of this epic event and it is now posted on youtube. Many thanks to Fred for coming out on this sloppy day. I hope to see him again when the play is a bit more precise! The highlight(s) of the day has to go to Justin with 4 interceptions (I think), two returned for touchdowns. If you are the opposing QB, watch that linebacker in the middle 'cause he's watching you.

Mrs T. received a very cool present from Mr. T fan Laura G at a recent party. That's a photo of the coveted prize to the right. You know you want one but, sorry, it's one of a kind. Who knew Christmas ornaments could be so cool?!

I found an article about competition in the Washington Post's archives. Think playing football is tough? You can read it yourself but what's interesting to me is how the town of Kirkwall, Scotland splits up geographically for the Old Ba' Game. For Mr. T football, there is a lot of smack every week about how the "red" team did this or did not do that. But it's meaningless historically because the "red" team has different players every week. So I thought it would be interesting if we could create teams geographically like North vs South or East vs West and make them permanent. Of course, we will always adjust when it's needed. See the poll to the right? If you play, answer it and let's see what we come up with.

This week it's time once again for the annual hangover bowl played on the 1st @ 10AM @ Waters field. And of course we also play on Saturday the 2nd @ 9AM @ Waters. It's double the pain with back-to-back days of football.  So, don't drink too much. This is Mr. T football and we are serious about sports!

See you Friday, 10 AM, Waters field. Remember when Mr. T wasn't so way cool and awesome? Me neither. Show up and don't be a prissy!

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T's Fan Club

5 out of 5 Dr.s recommend not pissing off Mr. T.

Lame. That's what I have to say to all that did not show up to play football this week. We played 5v5: Kevin, Criminal, Rick (narrowly avoiding the Speedwalker nickname), Billy E, Murdock, Cooley, Jeff, Rod, Big Jim and Tommy B. We played in near white-out conditions and it was awesome! Very little defense, lots of scoring: 48 - 34, I think. Lots of tackling and diving into the soft snow. It was hard to run, but it was the same for everybody and it was a great workout. We would have played again on Sunday but only three showed: Twinkle Toes, Rick & Tommy B. Snow was above the knees. It would have been an even better workout. Running in deep snow can make you strong like this guy. We played catch for 30 minutes and went home. Playing catch will not make you strong. Alas.

Now I can understand if you do not live in Vienna AND you do not own a four-wheel drive. Otherwise, what happened? Did the snowflakes keep you home? If they did I hope you got enough milk the night before and you gassed up your car. Because you're lame just like all the losers at the grocery Friday night. I got two emails Friday night and two calls Saturday morning asking me if we were still going to play. Huh? I thought we already went over this. One email actually said "Who makes the call on 'weather' the game is on"? WTF? Are you kidding me? This is Mr. T football - "T" being the operative letter here. And this "call" was made a long, long time ago. But, let's be absolutely clear: We always, always, always play football. It does not matter what else happens - snow storms, hurricanes, earthquakes, floods, tornados, heat waves, snipers, race riots, 9/11, 12/7, fires started by cows, shipwrecks, plague, volcanic eruptions, whatever. It just does not matter. We play. No more jibba jabba. Don't ask again and don't be a prissy.

Last week I was at a Christmas party and a lady asked me if girls can play Mr. T football. Sure. We believe in equal opportunity pain. So, if you know any girls that can hang, invite them out. Hell, maybe they'd actually show up! I bet this girl would play football in a blizzard.

The UF has decided he no longer plays football. Instead, he is going to focus on his new band. That's the UF pretending to play keyboard and guitar for his new gay friend. He also selected the wardrobe and choreographed the dancing.

This week is the Christmas edition of Mr. T football. We play 12/26, 9 AM, Waters. So, have a Merry Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus or whatever. Show up and don't make me count to 10, Mutha'uckers! Peace.

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T's Fan Club

Mr. T: one part gold, two parts muscle, three parts anger, and no parts jibba jabba.

Another big turn-out this week - we played 8v8. Kevin, Bannon the banker, Billy E, Mike C, Gio, Tito, Zach Cooley, Jeff, Bob V, Rod, Ryan, Murdock, Big Jim, Tim, John and Tommy B all made it out for the sub-30 degree start. The cold weather creates frozen turf which increases the pain! Decided by extra points, again, 26 - 25. Kickers we are not.

We saw some pretty fancy moves this week. Mike C was giving us USAF academy football demonstrations with his spin moves. Fortunately he's not demonstrating stiff-arms....yet. And Murdock was showing off his elite Marine Corp maneuvers doing the "drop and roll" for extra yardage and his patented "skip" move (not real sure the Corp would approve of the skip move, but I hear it does "impreez" the girls. So I hear.) The highlight of the week has to go to Tito who received a nice pass across the middle from Gio then ran past everybody for about a 70 yard TD. Note to self: Do not let Tito get any running room!

I think everyone can agree on the Mr. T fans' ideals for a good football game:

1. If it's a close call, give it to the offense - we like lots of scoring. 
2. Don't try to kill anybody. (We all like each other, right?) But if collisions happen, they happen.
3. And if you commit a foul and you know it, call it on yourself. 

I had DPI against Rod this week - I tagged prematurely. It was wrong but I just.... couldn't.... stop. Is anything good when it's premature? Bad, I know. Mr. T - searching the internet so you don't have to!

We still have yet to see the UF or speed-walking Rick L out on the turf this year. (If Rick does not show up soon, he will just become known as Speedwalker, sort of like Luke, only with shiny shorts instead of a shiny sabre.)  The UF? I think he had to stay home and clean the bathroom. Use the loofah. Hehehehe.

Last week, Mini T (Emily) was reading this blog (Don't worry - she's not allowed to click the links unless I clear them first.) She asked me "what does Mr. P mean?" Uh. So I said "uh, you know guys sometimes will kid around and call each other names? So, P stands for another word that means sissy." So she thinks about it for a second and then says "Prissy?" "Yes," I sigh. "That's it. Prissy." God I love her!

Next game is on 12/19 at 9 AM at Waters. Show up and meet my friend, PAIN. Don't be a Prissy!

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T's Fan Club

I'm teaching fools some basic rules.

Standing on the top of a Colorado peak in the bright, early morning sun, looking down into a chute covered in 3 feet of fresh powder as your heart pounds with fear and anticipation....  Kicking back in a comfy beach chair on a late summer afternoon in the outer banks watching the waves break as the sun sets behind you with a hot babe (Jojo - in my case this is always you, babe) and a cooler of cold bier within arm's reach....  Totally dialed-in mountain bike racing as you grease a sketchy downhill hanging on to a nose-wheelie with the crowds' oooohhhs and aaaahhhs as part of the barely perceptible background.... Playing football in the snow....needs no elaboration. So, what are a few of your favorite things?

Of course, I elaborate. I pity the fools that did not show up this past Saturday! We played an awesome 7v7. Twinkle Toes, Billy B, Big Jim, Murdoch, Kevin, Mike P, Tom H, Chico and the man, Bob the builder, Jeff F, Zach, Criminal, Tommy B and new T fan, Gibby, were all participants in pain. It started snowing before we started playing and it never stopped. The ball was like a little greased pig. It was hard to figure out where the first downs were - our markers kept getting snowed under. We couldn't find the sidelines or the end zones. It was hard to run, hard to stop running, hard to catch, hard to throw, hard to kick (only 3 for 8 on the extra point attempts). It was especially hard to keep your butt off the ground. Special features added for the game were fumbles and the new snowball huddle rule. For those of you that do not know it, there are normally no fumbles in touch football. But since the ground was so soft, we figured what the heck. And the snowball huddle rule is a special T feature: If the offense takes too long huddling, the defense throws snowballs at the huddle. Ahh. Few things in life are as much fun as playing football in the snow!

If you missed out today I hope it was not because you were lost. Waters was taken by a flag league so we moved to Madison. Remember, this is the procedure in this order (Go ahead and make yourself a little laminated card you can keep in your wallet if you think you will have trouble remembering this):

1. First go to Waters.
2. If Waters is taken, go to Madison
3. If Madison is taken, go to Marshall
4. If Marshall is taken, go to the VI.

If we end up on step 4 and you have no money, just put on the Mayor's Son-in-law's tab. Especially since he's been missing the past two games.

Now playing football without cleats is difficult. Playing football in the snow is also difficult. Playing football in the snow without cleats is, well, let's just say it's silly. We actually had 3 T fans trying to play in the snow with no cleats. Just get some of these, strap them on your sneakers and you'll be able to play just like Bob the builder. And I will make sure you're on my team so you don't step on me.

Rick L's been missing so far this year. Rumor has it he's got a new workout plan he's been doing to try to get ready. Come on Rick- play some football. Don't be a disgrace to the man race!

Next game is 12/12, 9 AM, Waters. It's time to run like a real man! Get some nuts!

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T's Fan Club

Week 2 Updates

This week we will begin playing at 9:30 AM. Why the delay? No good reason. There is a party that many T fans will attend Friday night. And it's not my party or else you would all be invited. Really. "There ain't no party like my nanny's tea party. Hi Ho." (Man this cracks me up. Linked again for your viewing pleasure.) I suspect many will require some extra time to sleep off their buzz. Also, I must take my daughter (Mini T? Mini me?) to her indoor soccer game which starts at 8 in Springfield. I will be back in time to play at 9:30. That's the real reason. Like I really care about anybody's hangover.

Jojo, aka Mrs. T, told me it is supposed to sleet Saturday morning and wondered would we still play? Huh? Is this a rhetorical question? This is Mr. T football. Not Mr. P football.

See you Saturday, 9:30 at Waters. Don't be a P, uh, Sissy.

Tommy B
Chief Antagonizer
Mr. T's Fan Club